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No Means No

Key Fact

What is sexual consent?

The law says that sexual consent is when a person who is 16 years or older, agrees by choice to any kind of sexual activity and has the freedom and capacity to make that choice.

PC Brown’s Advice

PC Brown’s Advice

Preview of PC Brown’s Advice

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Top Tips

Remember

  • Everyone has the right to feel safe.
  • You always have the right to choose who touches you sexually.
  • Sexual consent should be given every time you are sexually active with another person.
  • Only have sex if you really want to. That’s true the first and every time you are sexually active.
  • It’s completely OK to say ‘No’ or ‘Stop’ at any point if you don’t want to continue.
  • If you want to have sex but your boyfriend or girlfriend doesn’t, you must respect their feelings.
  • Sexual contact with someone without their consent is a sexual assault.
  • Sexual abuse is if someone forces you into sexual activity you don't want or threatens you if you do not have sexual contact with them.
  • Blame lies with the perpetrator of the sexual assault, not the victim.

Things to Make You Think!

  • The age of consent is the age at which the law says that it's legal to have sex.
  • In Wales and England, the age is 16 for everyone, whether gay, heterosexual (straight) or bisexual.
  • Although it's the legal age of consent, 16 is not necessarily the right age for you to start being sexually active. Only you will know what’s right for you, so set your own boundaries.
  • Part of being in a healthy relationship means being confident to share your personal boundaries and knowing that your boundaries will be respected.
  • Don’t feel awkward about saying no to kissing, touching or any other sexual activity. Let your partner know if you feel unsure.
  • If your boyfriend or girlfriend tries to force you to go further sexually than you want to, then your relationship is not healthy or safe so it's time to get out.

Introduction

Your school police officer is here to help you understand

  • What is sexual consent?
  • Why is consent important?
  • Who can help?

Question and Answer

Question: Are most young people having sex?
Answer: No – studies show that most young people wait until they're at least 16 to have sex, and some wait much longer. Being in love doesn't mean you have to have sex, and having sex doesn't mean you're in love!
Question: Is it OK to have sex once you're 16?
Answer:

Once you’re over 16 it's legal for you to consent to any kind of sexual activity as long as you have the freedom and capacity to make that choice. That means that you aren’t being forced, pressured or threatened to agree and you aren’t drunk, drugged, asleep or unconscious.

But it is illegal for people in a 'position of trust' like teachers, carers and doctors to have sex with young people under-18 in their care.

Question: How do I know if sexual consent has been given?
Answer: Talk to your partner. If you are in any doubt that they have given their sexual consent, either verbal or non-verbal, you must stop and find out before continuing with any sexual activity otherwise it could be perceived as rape or sexual assault.
Question: What happens if I have underage sex?
Answer: In law, if you are under 16, you cannot give informed consent to sex. So a boy who has sex with a girl under 16 is breaking the law – even if she agrees. A girl aged 16 (or over) who has sex with a boy under 16 can also be prosecuted for sexual assault.
Question: What is sexual assault?
Answer: Sexual assault is when someone intentionally touches another person in a sexual way without their consent. It is unwanted sexual behaviour that makes someone feel uncomfortable, intimidated or afraid. It includes touching with any part of the body, with anything else and through anything such as clothing.
Question: Where can I go for help?
Answer:

Sexual assault is a crime, no matter who commits it or where it happens. Don’t be afraid to get help.

If you need help, you can call:

  • The Police
  • ChildLine on 0800 1111
  • NSPCC Cymru on 0808 100 25 24
  • The All Wales Domestic Abuse and Sexual Violence Helpline 0808 8010800
  • The Dyn Project provides support for male victims on 0808 801 0321
  • Hafan Cymru supports victims of sexual crimes. www.hafancymru.co.uk
  • A sexual assault referral centre (SARC), if there's one in your area, where you can get specialist support and medical care if you have been sexually assaulted.
  • A doctor or practice nurse at your GP surgery.
  • The Rape and Sexual Abuse Support Centre on 0808 802 9999

Calls are free from most landlines however calls from mobiles may be charged depending on your network.

If you need help, phone ChildLine on

0800 1111

Calls are free from most mobiles and landlines.

Your call will not show up on the bill.

Live Fear Free Helpline

0808 8010 800

Calls are free from most landlines.

Calls from mobiles may be charged depending on your network.

You can also call NSPCC Cymru on

0808 100 25 24

Calls are free from most landlines.

Calls from mobiles may be charged depending on your network.